Fat Free News

Vampire Cricketer In Dubai

fatfreenews — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 11:10:57 +0000

england cricketer andrew flintoff is an empty-headed vampire-zombie, pumped full of dubai steroids who is on the rampage – thirsty for blood – in search of his next victim. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/celebritytravel/7221016/Andrew-Flintoffs-Dubai.html

Greedy Gervais

fatfreenews — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 10:23:14 +0000

ricky gervais is putting out an animated version of the ricky gervais show on hbo. hmm, not so sure. stop getting greedy gervais, you little gerbil.

Film Critic

fatfreenews — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 10:20:44 +0000

every film i watch now i’m thinking about the oscars. avatar, a serious man, the cove, food inc. etc. i have one eye on the film and one eye on the announced oscar nominations list. kind of annoying. and i kid myself into thinking i’m a film critic. bit like the oscars kids itself into thinking it’s an independent, non-self promotional non-marketing campaign for the u.s. film industry. ho hum.

End Of Days

fatfreenews — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 09:07:10 +0000

how insignificant days are these days, i mean, in the grand scheme of things that is. take the superbowl the other sunday. what a load of hot air – and now who gives a crap. all that nachos and beer and american family bull crap. today, valentines day, again, who will even be thinking about it tomorrow (matt groening’s birthday).

Olympic Lame

fatfreenews — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 05:56:47 +0000

i read an article last sunday by the canadian editor of monocle magazine that canadians were crap at self-promotion, and suffered from the ‘comfies’ – which as i understood just meant a bit too comfortable, complacent and reticent to ruffle too many feathers on the international stage. case in point, the olympics. well well well. two questions: first, name one person who’s won a gold medal? second, blah blah blah (i’m bored already)…

Headline Fighters

fatfreenews — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 20:58:22 +0000

two headlines from the christian science monitor about the iran protests. proves how screwed up the whole situation is, and news outlets are scrambling around in the dark for any idea of what’s happening: “iran opposition protests fizzle in face of overwhelming security” and “despite harsh threats, Iran protesters show their strength”. so, clear then.

I’m Going To Graduation (The Graduation Song)

fatfreenews — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 20:54:53 +0000

can’t stop singing the song that the college kid off scrubs who can’t make it to his graduation sings while in the hospital bed. jd turns to look at the kid, who’s sing “i’m goooooing to graduaaaaaaaation, i’m goooooooing to graduaaaaaaaaation”. sometimes singing is the best medicine.

What A Week

fatfreenews — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 17:32:11 +0000

i’m loving this post super bowl, pre-iranian revolutionary anniversary, pre-vancouver winter olympic games, pre-portland jazz festival week.

Funny Phrases

fatfreenews — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 17:24:36 +0000

found myself using the phrase ‘better the devil you know’ a lot today. guess it was just one of those days. hmm. maybe tomorrow will be “keep your friends close, but your enemies closer”. what am i like, eh? what am i like?

Burgertastic

fatfreenews — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 14:18:37 +0000

mcdonald’s sold less burgers in the US last year. but elsewhere, especially in the middle east, sales were scorching. places like dubai love that stuff. they can’t get enough of it. me want food.